ALL MOMS WHO HAVE TO RAISE SONS KNOW ABOUT SOME FEATURES OF THEIR UPBRINGING. IN THIS ARTICLE, ONE OF THE EXPERIENCED MOMS HAS COLLECTED THE MOST USEFUL PRACTICAL ADVICE FOR RAISING BOYS.
I was sure that I could properly raise the girl and teach her a lot – after all, as a woman, I had my own rich experience. But instead of a daughter, with whom, I am sure, we would have an innate relationship, a son was born. And then another one. Then another. And one more. Four boys and not the slightest idea of how to raise them properly.
But as it turned out later, with the help of intuition and numerous errors, I managed to overcome difficulties and learned to find a common language with boys. Raising boys suddenly turned out to be a surprisingly interesting process, especially after I learned about some of the key points regarding behavior – a kind of life hacks.
In addition, I asked my friends and acquaintances – mothers raising boys – to tell about those life-stories that had helped them. The result is a long list of carefully selected parenting tips from experienced mothers.
1. It doesn’t matter what item you buy – the main thing is that the label has one of the marks: “wear-resistant” or “durable”.
If we talk about the peculiarities of the upbringing of boys, then it is important to remember that with boys it is difficult to keep anything safe and sound. This applies to all things. Yes, boys can be calm and careful – these are wonderful, but, unfortunately, rare moments, so I advise you to be patient.
2. Get a dog.
The dog will become a good sparring partner for them (if the breed is rather big). Walking and playing with the dog will help the boys use up some of their exuberant energy. In addition, caring for an animal fosters a sense of responsibility in children. This is extremely important when raising boys in a family with younger brothers or sisters.
3. Teach them to pee while sitting.
Who came up with the “brilliant” idea to teach boys to pee while standing? Most likely a guy! And although the anatomy of the male body allows them to “aim” during the process, this does not mean that the boys will always hit the target. In fact, I would say that 90% of the time it is like spraying from a fire hose. They will pee standing up if they like it when they grow up, but until then, train them to do it sitting.
4. Teach children to clean up after themselves in the toilet as early as possible.
Even small children are able to wipe up the splash from uncontrollable streams ( advice: buy more antibacterial wipes). My sons, for example, have been able to clean the toilet since they were eight years old. It will save you from having to wash the “results” of boys’ visits to the toilet. By the way, this process is as unpleasant for them as it is for me, so next time they will be more careful, knowing that they will have to wash after themselves. A win-win, isn’t it?
5. Turn your routine into a fun competition.
The main thing to remember about raising boys is that all boys love to compete. Everything turns into a race: the fastest cornflake eater; the strongest carrier of grocery bags, etc. Therefore, if they refuse to do something, ask them to find out who can fulfill your request faster. The best incentive for boys is the chance of becoming a winner, even if they are not formally winning anything.
6. Learn to recognize your son’s socks and underpants.
If you have several boys in your family, it can sometimes be difficult to figure out which socks belong to whom. To make things easier, buy items with noticeable details for each of your son. For example, if I see socks with a blue stripe, then I know that they are the middle son’s, because I specifically buy such for him; but the boxers with the black stripes belong to my eldest son.
7. Buy many, many different pants.
Regardless of preference – jeans or sweatpants – boys wear them out at a breakneck speed (do they eat them, or what?). The problem with a shortage of trousers will come up all the time, so I advise you to buy them in large quantities – at sales – so that next time you will be armed when you find another hole in your trousers (most often on knees).
8. Lots of food for a snack.
As a rule, boys eat often and a lot. But there are also those who push their portion aside and then dig into the dessert. In any case, always have a large number of different snacks on hand. Also, teach your children to cook for themselves something simple, like sandwiches or scrambled eggs, otherwise you will have to do it every five minutes.
9. Many, many toothbrushes.
All parents who are thinking about the correct upbringing of boys need to remember that brushing your teeth does not give much pleasure to most restless boys. They will look for any reason not to do this – “lost” their toothbrushes (how?),or they do not want to use the brush, because the brother has already brushed her teeth. You should have plenty of new brushes in stock for all these occasions to put a stop to the boys’ urge to make excuses for poor oral hygiene.
10. Many, many batteries.
For pretty much anything they like, they need batteries. It is better to stock up on them in advance to avoid “disasters” due to low batteries in their favorite toy. One tip: keep your supplies away from the boys, otherwise they will constantly change batteries (even when not necessary).
11. Don’t expect them to be familiar with personal hygiene.
For example, how and when to use deodorant. It’s a bit of a struggle to keep them clean and fresh, especially at an age when they start to feel shy. Try to delicately explain to the boys how to wash properly, and in some places specifically. It may surprise you, but many boys think that splashing water is enough to keep them clean.
12. Having hidden something forbidden high, do not expect that it will stop them.
For example, those batteries mentioned earlier. Be sure the boys will find a way to reach them. It’s a skill that has been practiced since they’ve learned to reach for things.
13. Build a good first aid kit.
This is a necessary thing that can be useful at any time. All the parents with whom we discussed raising boys from birth say that endless falls, bruises and other minor troubles happen to boys all the time. Regardless of their age.
14. Explain that it is okay for boys to like not all stereotypical “boyish things”.
Not every boy likes sports, trucks or dinosaurs. If your son’s hobbies differ from those of his peers, try to become his most devoted ally. Support and encourage him in any way you can. Remember this is one of the most important rules for raising boys.
15. Explain that he doesn’t always need to hide his emotions.
Unfortunately, the expression “be a man” is still valid. Explain to the boys that crying is a natural reaction. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that, so there is no need to tell your sons: “Stop it now.”
16. Let the older brothers teach the younger ones what they are interested in.
This is a great experience of interaction between older and younger brothers. In addition, when they are all engaged in the same business, the atmosphere in the house is calm, peaceful.
17. Be sure to check their trouser pockets before washing.
Do this always, otherwise one day you will accidentally wash the frog in the machine. Or all the savings of a second grade for the purchase of an army compass.
18. Let them take old things apart from time to time.
Some boys like to do smthr with their hands. Find old or unnecessary things for them – they like to disassemble them in parts, and use not in a way you do. When we gave our eldest son an old computer, he learned to change the hard drive, and our “old man” started working again. The boy was very proud of this. Considering the fact that up to this point we had to say goodbye to a brand new iron and a smartphone, I decided to give the boys old devices.
19. Maintain a minimalist interior style.
What a beautiful vase you saw at the sale! Forget about it, as well as about your pleasant rest on soft cushions. You will have to say goodbye to beautiful decor items for a long time. At least until your naughty boys grow up and become calmer.
20. Talk to them when doing things together.
My sons will buzz my ears about their favorite computer games, but if I ask them how the day went, I get a very short answer: “Good.” The trick is that it’s best to communicate with them while playing together – playing basketball, doing puzzles, playing computer games. They seem to become more open when their hands are busy. So it is worth remembering this important rule on how to raise boys.
21. Learn to cut their hair.
You can find many good video tutorials on the Internet, and if you take the time to watch them and buy good scissors, then you can save a lot on your boys’ haircut.
22. Have a list of their sizes (especially shoes) in your smartphone and keep it updated.
Thus, at the right time you will have useful information – for example, when there is a day of sales or promotions in the store, and the boys are not with you. This is one of the important parenting tips for moms. Dads, of course, do their best to avoid going shopping.
23. Let them sleep in sweatpants instead of pajamas.
Three of my four boys prefer what they call “comfy pants” sweatpants. So in the evening after the bath, following the style of a lazy mom, I let them wear sweatpants and a T-shirt instead of their usual pajamas. Thus, in the morning they wake up already dressed.
24. Hug them as often as possible.
Boys are affectionate creatures, they need physical touch. Their hugs cause incomparable sensations! And if you don’t cuddle with them as often as possible, you will lose a lot. This is perhaps the most important thing in the upbringing of boys.
Here are some great tips to listen to right from the start of parenting. They will help make your life much easier.
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